Today is my one year anniversary of officially moving to New York City. I can't say whether it feels like it's been shorter or longer because I feel them both at the same time. So much has happened within the past 12 months. I rejoined my amazing Dreamer family for the summer and was fortunate to mentor 100 students pursuing their dream jobs. I had an apartment for two seconds, but ended up not having it because the landlord said my friend's and I didn't have enough proof of financial stability. I took a roadtrip with my mom to move my belongings and my little fluff ball, Coco, from Florida to a sublet. I finally found a permanent place and moved in with complete strangers, who have now become some of my very good friends. I worked for one of the highest rated luxury retail companies in the world. I met endless amounts of incredible people who have impacted my life greatly. I lived through one of the worst winters New York has seen in decades. I fell in and out of love. I rediscovered my passion for writing poetry, which had been lost for many years. I was unemployed for five weeks. I was absolutely dirt poor and when I say poor, I mean I had pennies to my name. I lost a friend to a motorcycle accident. My grandpa was in and out of the hospital. Needless to say, this year has had its ups and downs.
Many of these things happened within seven weeks. April was the hardest month I have ever had to experience in my 24 years of existence. My heart and mind were in an extremely dark place, uncertain and lost within vulnerability. Staying positive was more than a struggle, which if you know me is absolutely nothing like my character. Everything I did felt emotionally draining. All I could do was try my very best to keep my head above the water. And this is the time where I thank the people that I am eternally grateful for:
- To my family, you have and always will be my backbone. Every day you called to help keep me sane. You pushed me to be better, albeit gently as you understood how fragile I was at the time. Your unconditional love continues to serve me throughout the cloudy days and into the sunny ones. Mom, Dad, Adam, Kevin, I love you four the most. Always.
- Anthony, you sir have become such a blessed part of my life here in the city. I simply put could not have survived my lull without you. When I had no money, you took me out and paid for me. When I couldn't be alone, you gave me a bed to sleep in and a loving body to hold onto. When I forgot my profound love for the world, you reminded me of who I am. No amount of money will ever repay you for the friendship you have given me. I love you so much Antonio.
- Courtney, there is a reason why you are my other half. Thank you for doing what you do best, making me laugh. Always making me smile. They say laughter is the best medicine, well you and I know it's undoubtedly true. Thank you for being my best friend, for being the yin to my yang, for always knowing the right things to say even if you are countless miles away from me. I love you brodog.
- My beautiful Lieter, you are honestly what got me through every day. You may not know this, but you were my beacon of light within the darkness. I cannot express to you how much it meant to have you checking on me constantly. You and I have been through a lot this year. I have dropped the ball on a few occasions. No longer will that be the case. Although we are at different places in our lives, I do believe our paths will cross again someday when it suits us both. I will be ready this time. That's a promise. I love you Lola.
- SARAH! The biggest thank you of all goes to you because you rock hardcore. Your random phone call may have gotten me a job, but more importantly it gave me hope when I so desperately needed it. Never did I think I'd see the day when I'd say thank heavens for Bahama Breeze, but alas! Without it I never would have met you down in Florida to begin with. All of these people were my shelter from the storm, but you were the savior that stopped the torrential downpour completely. Thank you for pulling me out of my funk, unlimited amounts of love to you!
One entire year. 365 days. I now have two jobs that I love. I'm stable again, in more ways than one. The rough patch that I went through has made me stronger, wiser, more aware of my surroundings and more aware of myself. As I always have in my times of struggle, I now look back and embrace the hardships. I am not bitter about the things that have happened. The situations we find ourselves in all serve a purpose. My purpose this time was to come out ten times stronger and 100 times more radiant than before. It's springtime. The trees have leaves again, the families in my neighborhood are having BBQs out in the street on the weekends and I have found again my equilibrium between insanity and determination. How fitting it was for me to be sitting in Union Square Park when I realized it's been a year, the very first place I called home in NYC. Never again will I forget my boundless potential. I'll leave this with the best piece of enlightenment from my precious little brother during a phone call in the peek of my oppression. Although they are someone else's words originally, they were exactly what I needed to hear at the time and have stuck with me ever since.
"Doubt kills dreams more often than failure." - Kevin Moody
No comments:
Post a Comment